¿comó se llama?

i’ve already talked about how my name is disappointing to everyone here because it’s not accompanied by four other names. so i’ve compiled a list of things that people have decided to call me at one point or another during my time here – since “laura” just isn’t cool, or informative enough:

laurita: i think it’s so cute how in the spanish language you can add “ita/o” to ANY word and it becomes “little ______.” seriously, isn’t that the cutest thing ever?? most everyone outside of the school calls me this. i love it!!!

señorita laura/laurita: rolando, the guy in charge of the peace corps ag4/ee group LOVES to call me this whenever i talk to him. apparantly there is this famous latin american song called “señorita laura” and rolando always sings the first couple of lines when he sees me. also, the kids at the school have adopted this name for me, as opposed to “seña,” which is what all the other teachers are called. they are all married, except for bessy who’s divorced, which is why they get the title “seña” and i get “señorita.”

niña laura: a couple of the kids call me this at the school. i think “niña” is appropriate for anyone who is not married and is over the age of 20.

claudia: ?????? the woman who runs the tienda at the top of the hill above the school calls me this. the first time she said it i thought i didn’t hear her right. after that i was thinking – does she really think my name is claudia? now, i think it’s too late to mention to her that it’s not my name, so i just smile and remind myself that i really don’t care because she’s giving me mangos and watermelon and i’m happy, whether she thinks my name is claudia or laura. the funny thing is, i think there is another person that i remember calling me this too. i just can’t remember who.

lauri: only one person calls me this and it’s rosita the person who cleans the hostal. she’s friendly, but not very talkative, and she’s pretty formal about stuff. so it’s kind of funny that she’s kind of adopted this nickname for me.

gordita: this means “fat,” but with the “ita” at the end, it means “little fat person?” “person who’s a little fat?” ?????? not sure. i really don’t know how this label gets used in such a weird way because i’ve heard people describe other people as gordita that aren’t even gordita – but it´s definitely not as offensive as it would be in the united states. normally i wouldn’t disagree with this description of me, but there was this one time when i was living in molineros that mama viviana wanted me to go with her and ana’s brother eduardo to the cemetary for day of the dead. so i go over to mama viviana’s house and proceed to try and cram myself into eduardo’s pickup truck, which is the size of a friggin’ clown car. i tried to say i would sit in the back, but mama viviana was adamant that i stuff myself into the front seat between her and eduardo. and of course there’s this giant stick shift right where i’m trying to put my legs. so eduardo’s trying to shift into reverse, my legs are all up in mama viviana’s face and finally eduardo mutters “gordita” in a joking way. and i’m thinking – i’m not one to disagree with you, but for christ sakes, your pickup was made for hobbits! WTF???

chola: more people have called me this than gordita and it means “sturdy” or “strong.” i’d have to agree with this more, i think. because in all honesty, while i’m bigger than most women here, and some men, it’s more because i’m taller. i definitely don’t have the salvadoran gut going on....which i’ve had many an opportunity to see, since one of the habits of a LOT of people here is to lift up their shirts just over their stomachs and proceed to rub their stomachs like you would the buddha’s. i’ve even caught myself doing this, minus the lifting up of my shirt, after eating a particularly good meal. i’m going to come back to the states and be so weird.....as if i wasn’t weird before i left.

delgada: ok, so this means “skinny” or “thin.” how someone could call me gordita one day, and then call me delgada the next is beyond me. but i think it has something to do with the fact that things are really black and white here. you’re either fat or you’re skinny. the weather’s either hot or cold. you’re either happy or you’re sad. a place is either far or close. there’s no in-between, no normal, no average. i’ve never heard someone say “the weather’s perfect today.” it’s either “hace calor!” or “hace frio!” nobody’s in-between happy and sad/mad. i think i’m healthy looking, on the “gordita” side. but i don’t even think there’s a word to describe normal....other than “normal.” so that’s why i was saying that “chola” seems to be a more appropriate description of me.

anciana: this word means ¨old woman.¨ this is a joke between antonio and me...he calls me “anciana” and i call him “anciano” because we are both in our 30’s – he’s 34, i’m 33. we’ll be hiking sometimes and i can tell when he is tired because he’ll stop and act like he is trying to tell me all about the plants and he’ll be like “this plant is called ______.” and he’ll do that like every 5 minutes. and i just hike slow. i’m not in a race to get to the top of a cerro, not that i COULD hurry even if i wanted to. anyway, it’s just really funny. actually, though, i got hooked up with a cool site here because all the teachers at my school are around the same age as me, and antonio is a year older than me, and a lot of people that i’ve made friends with are all about the same age. so i guess we’re all ancianos.

laura ann de cuerpo de paz: i don’t know why, but every time antonio gives me something work-related, he puts this on the envelope and on the piece of paper that has information on it. ???? he gave me a christmas card back in december that had this on the envelope and then inside the card itself. people here are so official, but “laura ann de cuerpo de paz” just looks funny. i saved it though because i’m sure in 10 years when i need a laugh, i can get out all the stuff that says that and smile.

hermosa/guapa/bonita/linda: as much as it might sound like a good thing to be called “beautiful,” really it’s just embarrassing. most of the time when people say this to me, they are talking about me to someone else, IN FRONT OF ME. they’ll say things like “oh, her eyes are the color of the sky!” or “her hair is beautiful.” things like that. and it’s just totally uncomfortable. because i just think that they think anyone who doesn’t have black/brown hair and brown eyes is beautiful just because its different from what they see every single day. what they don’t understand is that we see them as beautiful too! i’ll tell girls in the school that their hair is pretty and they’ll be like “what are you talking about?” and i understand their feeling, because that’s my reaction too when people say that to me. but the difference is, i see more people that look like them than they see of people that look like me. anyway, anna and i were talking about this and anna says it’s because we are different, or the exotic. wooooaaaahhhh....hold on there. exotic??? the my name should never, ever be linked with the word exotic. when i think exotic i think of people from the south pacific.....places like tahiti, or fiji, or from some other faraway place like bali, or the maldives, or india. not some girl from farm-town usa. in fact, i think i’m going to add the word exotic to my list of most-hated words.

gringa/gringita: surprisingly, not many people use this word. i probably use it more than any salvadoran does. although, elba’s youngest kid, rigo, calls me this when his mom asks him what my name is. it’s really funny. and plus he’s only 2 years old. so whatever.

here are some more pictures!!

adios for now!

this is elba´s husband, pedro, at his birthday party on february 25th. the girl to the right of pedro is elba´s (and pedro´s) daughter paola. (side note...at this birthday party i ate iguana for the first time. iguana tastes like chicken [doesn´t everything]. remembering how i had to pick up the green, slimy, scaly leg and eat off of it is just gross.)

this is in juayua on sunday...it was an awesome day and there was a soccer tournament going on in the stadium there. the volcanoes in the back are from right to left - izalco, cerro verde and santa ana.

another photo of the soccer game...my favorite player, numero diez bit the dust big time.

the market scene in juayua, with the ¨church of the black jesus¨ in the background

me at the laguna in ahuachapan

me with three more school kids

kids at the school

street scene in salcoatitlan (a town between apaneca and juayua)

another street scene in salcoatitlan

this was at another birthday party i went to a couple months ago....this girl has like 6 brothers and sisters!!

the mother of the girl in the previous picture, with her youngest child. this woman is going to help me plant strawberries at the school!

los niños y las niñas a la escuela

my first bad week

before i start talking about my shitty week, i just want to say a big ¨gracias¨ to EVERYONE who has sent me cards and letters and packages. it is awesome to get mail from back home...first because i do miss everyone (even if i don´t miss life in the states) and second because it´s in english.....having to speak and think in spanish all the time is seriously mentally tiring, so getting to read a nice long letter or card in english is muy tranquilo! some of you - i can´t believe i´ve gotten so many letters from (becky). and mark, becky and steve..that card with the squirrel was just friggin´ hilarious. i tried to explain it to antonio, but he thinks i´m officially a crazy person now. hahahaha. the pictures of your kids are awesome, and i show them to everyone here. i know it´s hard to take a couple of minutes to write a letter or whatever, but believe me, it´s totally appreciated and i can´t wait to get more!!! so muchas, muchas gracias!!!

well, things have been kind of crappy lately. i’ve been sick, which really kicked my ass, and let’s just say it’s a good thing this didn’t happen my first week here because i’d probably have left and gone back to the states. being sick sucks, and granted, this was just the flu, not one of the other crazy illnesses we gringos are prone to get here – ghirardia, dengue, parasites, worms..... but i haven’t had the actual flu in a super long time.....i get colds sometimes, but not that whole thing where you can’t believe how cold you are, yet your face is nearly in flames you are so hot. my temperature the saturday night (last week) hit 103 and i honest to god thought i was going to die in the fetal position in my bed, wearing three fleeces, two pairs of pants, two pairs of socks, underneath my three blankets and my sleeping bag. yes...i was THAT cold. i couldn’t figure out what the hell happened? thursday i started getting a cold...i was sneezing a ton and mirna was joking with me that i wasn’t going to come to school on friday because i was getting sick. in all honesty, it wasn’t that bad on thursday. i told her “no, i’ll be here.....it’s just the sniffles.” it felt like i was having some kind of allergic reaction, which isn’t that bad. but by the time i went to bed on thursday, my head was slowly filling with snot (nice visual, eh?) and i could barely breathe.

the next a.m. i realized there was no way i could go down to the school, so i basically laid in bed all day. i took tons of meds and felt somewhat better and even thought i had kicked it. by saturday, i was feeling pretty good and other than having to blow my nose every 15 seconds, i didn’t actually feel that bad. i even went into ataco with antonio to eat, but somewhere between getting off the bus and having a plate of food put in front of me, i went from feeling ok to feeling really bad. i could barely eat (which is the first sign there is something wrong....i loooove to eat here!) and when we were walking to one of his friend’s houses, i started to get that achy-oh-no-you-have-the-flu feeling. his friend wasn’t home so we walked over to the pupuseria to get chocolate/coffee and i suddenly was dying of thirst. don gerardo, the owner of the pupuseria was stunned when i didn’t want cafe (which i get EVERY time), but instead wanted a strawberry tropical - this amazing strawberry soda. i managed to drink that and then antonio and i left. the bus ride was absolute torture! antonio got off the bus in san jorge and i had another 5 minutes to apaneca where i thought that they were gonna have to greet me at the bus stop with a stretcher. i stumbled to the hostal and barely made it to my room i was shivering so bad. i took my temperature with one of these lame disposable thermometers the peace corps gave us and the first reading was 104 and i’m like “that can’t be! i’m freezing!” so i used another one and this one read 103. i don’t even remember the last time i had a 103 temperature? age 5? high school? hell if i know. i took a hot shower (thank GOD i am still in this cuarto with hot water......later, when i was feeling better, i thought about this for a minute....if i wouldn’t have had hot water that night, i think i might have dropped dead i was so cold. do i really want a house????), took some tylenol, layered on the fleece and other clothing and crawled into bed and wondered what the hell was happening. i mean, it was as if someone that i had wronged in the past had a voodoo doll and was sticking pins in it everywhere. everytime i moved, it was like the worst pain ever. you’re probably reading this thinking – jesus, she had the damn flu, it’s not that big of a deal!!! but seriously, i’m not kidding you, i’ve not had the fo’ real flu in such a long time....i can’t even remember the last time i felt this awful! it’s never been a yearly thing with me like it is with some people. i’ve never felt the need to get a flu shot or anything like that.

the next morning i woke up and felt a little better and my muscles were sore, i’m convinced from all the shivering i did the night before. i basically stayed in bed all day and tried to sleep. antonio came to the hostal and told me that when he went home the night before, he told his mom that i was sick and she was upset with him because he didn’t stay at the hostal that night because i was so sick. ????? i don’t even know how that would have worked, or what in god’s name antonio could have done to make me not have a 103 degree temperature or feel like i was dying a slow death, but i’m sure his mom thinks he’s some kind of miracle worker or something. i swear, moms here are in such adoration of their sons here, it´s borderline crazy. guys could be cold-blooded killers here, membes of the mara salvatrucha, and their moms are like ¨my son is so nice.¨ ugh. anyway, monday i didn’t go to the school either because instead of fever and chills, it was time for the wonderful “dolor de mi cabeza” (headache) that took up residence in my skull sunday night. this lasted until tuesday. yay for me. but i’m happy to report that by tuesday night, i was able to think (no headache), i was able to breathe (no more snot), i was able to wear just one fleece (no more chills) and most importantly, i was able to EAT!! i think this is the first time i would have been able to take nyquil for all the reasons it lists you should take it. now i can say that i really did get gripe (which in the dictionary is the definition for “flu”.......people here call everything from a sniffle to throwing your guts up on the street “gripe”). and gripe sucks!!!!!!!

the political scene here right now is absolutely nuts! there are constantly pickup trucks with gigantic speakers on the top blasting political messages from the political parties. the messages i heard today in apaneca were this: ARENA says that the FMLN is bad and that ARENA is gonna fix the roads. FMLN says that women should have more rights, schafik lives and to vote ¨positively.¨ i haven´t seen any trucks for the PDC. i did see one for the PCN today, but the pickup was just blasting music with a bunch of people sitting in the back. there was some kind of ARENA rally in apaneca today which was kind of annoying....not so much because there was a rally, but because they kept playing the same thing over again....and they kept playing this stupid ARENA commercial that ends with this kind of jingle that is a bunch of people saying ¨AAAAAAAARENA!¨ i get annoyed with the FMLN pickups because their speakers are always muffled and so it´s just really loud noise, kind of like if you´ve ever ridden a subway - especially the T in boston - i can barely make out the what the people are trying to say. anyway - it´s sure to get even more loco day after day.

i know it´s late, but knowing how channels like to replay programs.....the national geographic channel is airing an episode of it´s ¨explorer¨ series that takes a look at the salvadoran gangs. it was on tonight, but i´m sure they´ll replay it if you´re interested. i´m sure it´ll make el salvador look like a happy, wonderful place......not. but it might show a little of what el salvador looks like - so you can get a look at some of the neighborhoods or something. or if you just want to keep looking at my pictures, which i can assure you will never include photos of a barrio where gang members hang out, then don´t watch the program!

adios!

reasons why it´s not hard to laugh almost every day in el salvador

following is a short list of phrases i either thought to myself, or said outloud to other people, during my trip to molineros this past weekend:

“man, i’m glad that clown didn’t get on the bus.” so i was on bus #205 somewhere around nuevo lourdes and i looked out the window to see a man in a clown getup just miss getting on the bus. i had been riding the bus for about an hour at this point, and for most of that time had to listen to three men selling things on the bus, which can make you almost go out of your mind. one guy was selling some kind of medicine that i think he was claiming cured everything, including cancer. the second guy was selling these pictures of wilderness scenes. the third guy was selling tiny address books with what else but looney toons characters on them, and in the back were yes, you guessed it, passages from the bible. the buses here are a moving carnival, i swear. at every semi-major stop, women and men, and sometimes kids, hop on the bus and go up and down the aisles selling everything from pupusas to candy to water to toys to vegetables – and everything inbetween. you could almost do all of your grocery shopping simply by riding the bus around the country for a couple of hours. the “candy man” is the person seen most on the bus, and often times these men, in addition to selling “dulces and chicle,” also sell drugs when their stint on the bus is over for the evening. and did you all know that halls mentho-lyptus is really candy? seriously. here, halls is peddled on the buses under the guise of “dulces.” anyway, when these people get on the bus to sell things, it doesn’t matter if the bus is jam-packed with people. they push their way through the aisles shoving whatever it is they’re selling in your face. then there are the people like i mentioned previously that get on the bus and once the bus is moving, stand up and begin their speeches. a man could be selling something as simple as pencils – he’ll still find a way to talk for at least ten minutes about what the pencil can do. he’ll even demonstrate. i once told anna that big companies should recruit some of these people for sales positions. they do an awesome job of describing and selling such simple items, and they are so confident about it. in any event, when i saw the guy in the clown outfit in nuevo lourdes, i really didn’t want to see him get on the bus and sell whatever it was he was obviously going to sell. it would’ve just been too ridiculous.

“wait! stop! the puppy’s eating pig poop!” mama rosa somehow obtained two puppies – one female and one male. she wants to give me the female, but i told her i couldn’t have a dog until i get a house – if i ever get one. anyway, on friday when i arrived, mama rosa came over with a puppy on a leash and i about went crazy it was so cute. then she told me there was another one at her house, so dayana, sindy, jacqueline, fiorela and i walked across the road to mama rosa’s house to see the other one. he was absolutely inhaling its dog food that mama rosa had fed him. so when he was done, we walked around the house with it on its leash and sindy wanted to hold the leash so i gave it to her. but when we put the other puppy near it, they started playing and before long it was too much for sindy and she couldn’t hold onto the leash anymore. well, the puppy ran immediately over to the area where mama viviana (who lives next door) has her two pigs and began eating pig poop. of course, in seeing this, dayana started cracking up and i started yelling, in english, that this was gross and bad. i do this all the time when i’m reacting to something spur of the moment – i do it in english and it’s really quite funny. anyways, we got the puppy corralled and back to eating more dog food. you know, i’m surprised mama rosa had dog food for them because here, most puppies are left to scavenge like the adults are. the whole dog situation here is sad – at least in the campo. people here think i’m crazy for wanting to pet dogs or talk to them or whatever. people here just don’t treat their dogs like we do in the states. it’s like people want them to guard their houses and all that, but when it comes to feeding them properly or caring about them, they just don’t. i guess it’s hard when they are having a hard time feeding the members of their family, to feed the dog too. but it just seems like it’s out of control. there are dogs everywhere here, always scavenging, wandering the streets and getting in fights. i probably won’t get used to it, but it’s the way of life here.

“i could really go for a bag of water right now.” i actually think this a lot, but i just think that a “bag” of any kind of drink is hilarious. they sell bags of water, and sometimes, when you buy a soda or juice or whatever, the person selling it pours it in a bag and sticks a straw in and hands it to you. it’s odd at first, but actually, you get used to it. the other day i ate yucca out of a bag. basically, this is prepared by putting a few slices of yucca, some cerdo (pig) beef/fat, curtido and salsa in a bag and tying it shut. then the person eating it tears a corner of the bag open and eats the yucca that way. also people here sell what could be the greatest creation ever – chirimusco (I don´t think that´s the right spelling, but whatever). anyway, it’s cafe made with milk, not water, and sugar. they put this in a bag, tie it shut and freeze it. it only works with instant coffee and it’s friggin’ fantastic.

“wait a minute, where’d the kitchen go?” as i walked from the road to ana’s tienda/house, i came around the side and realized that the kitchen was pretty much gone. after expressing my surprise, ana told me that she had talked to her husband (who is living in the states) and they both agreed that the house should have more bedrooms. so papa ovidio and some other dudes had begun constructing two additional bedrooms and a storeroom to the back of the house. in addition, ana was moving the kitchen indoors, to my old room, and that way she could keep an eye on the tienda while she was in the kitchen. plus, she said, it was dangerous for her at night having to be outside where the kitchen used to be. so the next time i visit, she told me, i’d be sleeping in a whole new room!

“what the hell, more clowns?” on my way to molineros, there were two more dudes dressed up like clowns and i was seriously almost laughing out loud. clowns can be scary – but they can almost be ridiculously funny and seeing three in one day almost sent me into hysterics. one time, while waiting at desvio #51, i saw a guy dressed up as a clown, but he was with his non-clown friend, and he was also smoking a cigarette. good times.

“why does that bus have a sticker of “the mummy” on the back of it? and why is it spelled “mumy” because mummy in spanish is “momia.” along with the religious and looney toons character stickers you see adorning buses here, you also see random things like “the mumy” stickers. seriously, WTF? they leave you confused and feeling slightly stupid for even trying to find the logic in them.


anyway, that´s just a short list. if i could remember every crazy phrase i thought to myself or said to my friends or other people, i´d probably exceed the limit on the number of blog entries one person is allowed.

here´s some photos from molineros......adios for now!!!

dayana, sindy and fiorela

dayana

a little dark - but me, the male puppy and dayana

the female puppy

sindy