attack of the parasites....and work stuff, too

dudes, i´m all kinds of sick. parasites have taken over. i´ve been sick for like 2 weeks but i still haven´t gone to the doc´s because every day i wake up (after not eating all night obviously) and feel ok. that, and i don´t want to sit on the bus for forever while being sick. plus, i don´t know where the doc´s is in sonsonate (the lab closest to me) and i´m not that big of a whimp that i can´t just go and find it....but me being all bummed out and all, i just don´t think i can take it when fifty salvadorans are staring at me on the bus or in sonsonate. so i keep putting it off because i think i don´t have to go right away. but then at night, i get kicked in the ass once again.

so antonio told me he´d go to sonsonate with me this morning to show me where the place is and then he said he would go see the davinci code with me at the metrocentro there. i thought - well there´s an idea. i can find the place and hopefully the movie will make me not think about parasites in my intestines. but then he came this morning and told me that now he´s sick and he felt really bad and said we could go tomorrow. i totally understood because he was looking pretty sick. but then i suddenly got all upset - not that we weren´t going, but everything surrounding me being sick and not being back home in the states. i was like pissed off at EVERYTHING....like if i were sick in the states, i could just go to the damn doctor, IN A CAR....or, better yet, if i was in the states, i probably wouldn´t have parasites.....i was pissed because after watching and supporting my beloved detroit tigers after having losing seasons that were secured in APRIL for the past 8 years or whatever, they now have the best record in baseball and are actually WINNING and have a WINNING RECORD and i´m friggin´ in central america, miserable, with parasites....i was pissed that my WINNING streak of not getting sick - like parasites and amoebas - has come to an end (8 months isn´t bad though)....i was pissed that this book that i had my parents waste postage to send me is the stupidest book i´ve ever read in my life, so bad, in fact, that i quit the book after getting halfway through it, i actually threw it on the floor and considered using it to line the second wormbox i´m gonna make at the school....i was pissed that there is all this drama going on at the school (including my own frustrations which i´ve documented below) between the teachers and i´m thinking, goddammit, it´s the same everywhere you work, no matter what country.....

so antonio´s like we can just go today - let´s go! and i felt even worse because i was making him feel bad so i apologized and told him i didn´t mean that i was pissed because we weren´t going and all. i explained what i just explained to you all above. then he said we could go tomorrow when he felt better. then he said something about him feeling responsible to help me out because it´s not my country and i don´t ¨have¨ anyone here like a family to be there when i am feeling crappy and all. so that made me feel better.

anyways...enough of that. (as if this post about my work wasn´t long enough when i wrote it last night, i had to go and add that beginning .part today).....



so i’m gonna talk about work stuff now. it’s been the cause of great happiness and joy working with the kids, but has also been super frustrating as well. i’m doing a myriad of things at the school, and less with the community right now, just because that’s how it’s worked out these past couple of months. i’ve got this harebrained idea/proposal that i may or may not go forward with, so i won’t go into that right now. i’ll stick with writing about what i’m actually doing.

LOS HUERTOS (aka me and my green thumb!)

because the rainy season (winter) just started, it’s been kind of hectic trying to get planting stuff done. the huertos are coming along little by little. let me start way back when i went to the ENA training at the end of april. it was cool because we had a session on vegetable planting and learned all this new stuff which was super informative to me. one of the biggest problems, however, is where in the hell salvadorans are supposed to get seeds to plant vegetables. i went to about five agroservicios in ahuachapán and they all only had cucumber, tomato and radish seeds. one place had carrot seeds but they were in this huge can that cost $7.00 and i was like screw that. and when i was in san vicente for language training i went to three agroservicios there and they had the same seeds. i’m like what the hell?? one guy in an agroservicio in ahuachapán told me that it’s easier for people to buy stuff that’s imported from guatemala so they don’t grow that stuff here and that’s why there’s no seeds....because there’s no market for them. but that’s bullshit, because at one of those meetings in san jorge, all the moms were complaining that vegetables were too expensive to buy for their families to eat all the time. they could only afford them once in a while for sopa de pollo or something like that. so whatever...that guy’s full of crap that i talked to in ahuachapán.

so, when i was at the ENA i asked the dude who was giving us the tech session on vegetable planting that i was having a problem finding seeds. i told him how i went to all these agroservicios and none of them had anything but the big three. he tells me that there’s an agroservicio in santa tecla that usually has a bunch of different kinds and i thought, well that’s great.......buuuuut, santa tecla is just outside of san salvador. that’s not something that’s feasible for the people in my area...it’s too damn far! i’m supposed to be teaching these people to be self-sufficient and teaching them how they can provide for themselves, but i can’t tell them that in order to get started they have to go to santa tecla and find some random agroservicio that may or may not have the seeds they want. i need to call CENTA (this ag group here in el sal) or write them a letter and express this concern because it’s not gonna work for these people if they can’t get the seeds to plant, ya know? so my dad ended up sending me a bunch of seeds from the states so i could at least teach the kids how to plant stuff and the people of the community will see that we have stuff growing and all that. so that was frustration number one.

secondly, at the ENA, i got a lesson on direct and indirect planting. apparently, since there are so many crazy bugs here, as well as lots of times when there’s waaaay too much irrigation from the rain, there are lots of plants that should be started off in planters and not in the ground. i never thought about this because back in the states, every spring when my dad “planted the garden,” we always put the seeds in the ground directly and each summer we’d have feast after feast of awesome vegetables until we could eat no more. i don’t remember him ever starting any seeds in a planter or anything. maybe i was spaced out or something. but anyway, this guy at the ENA was telling me that certain plants HAVE to be started in the semilleros (starter boxes) here because they’re super delicate and if bugs have a go (specifically zampopos...these humungous ants like i’ve never seen before) or it rains super hard, the plants will totally croak. i knew we had about 3 or 4 of these semilleros at the school left over from some school project way back when. i asked the guy where i get those and he says “at an agroservicio.” and i’m thinking – oh great...wonder how many i’ll have to go to to find them. so of course, i go to one in ahuachapán and the dude tells me the only place to get them is in san salvador. ugh. are you friggin’ kidding me? so i finally just ask him to show me the smallest plastic bags they have and i decide that i can use them instead. so i buy a couple hundred of those and decide to improvise. i ended up taking those bags and folding them in half so they’re not so big and they’ve worked out fantastically. we have lots of dirt so it’s no big deal that i’m using more dirt than i would in a semillero, but geez. but we can also use these again and again as long as they don’t get torn or something. so first we planted tomatoes and then cabbage. they’re growing like crazy and it’s almost time to transplant both of those...probably in a couple weeks or less. last week, a group of 4th and 3rd grade boys and i planted lettuce and beets in some more bags. so we have four different types of vegetables growing in bags in back of the school. they seem to be doing fine. but the whole semillero thing was frustrating.

also last week, the 5th and 6th grade boys and i planted radishes, sugar snap peas and carrots. the peas and the radishes have already started coming up and we’re waiting on the carrots. i’ve been a little concerned because it has been raining like CRAZY here and it’s cold too. i asked elba if this was normal weather in may and she said it’s not supposed to get this rainy/cold until july or something. so who knows what’s up, but the huertos seem to be fine. this past week some 3rd and 4th grade girls and i planted cucumbers, and then some 5th and 6th grade girls helped me plant spinach and corn. so we’ve got a lot of things growing, basically on the same schedule, but we’ve still got more to plant. it’s been hard though because it’s been raining so much and it’s difficult to get up there and plant stuff when it’s pouring. plus, the huertos that don’t have anything planted in them keep getting overrun with zacate and other crazy weeds because of all the rain, and i’m constantly having to clear that. so that’s been kind of frustrating too.

but planting with the kids has been great. they all love that they get to do this kind of stuff. sometimes they get WAY too overexcited and i’m in the middle of this pack of kids that are shouting and holding out their hands “dame más semillas señorita laura!” and they don’t quite get the whole idea of spacing out the seeds a little....but whatever. and when i had the girls planting cucumber i told them to get some rocks to mark the rows and i didn’t notice until later when i was uploading the pictures off my camera onto the computer that they took the friggin’ rocks from the carrot rows to put on the cucumber rows. and because the carrots haven’t come up, i have no idea where the rows are. ugh! but anyways....it’s all good. what’s really funny and nostalgic though is that i’ll be washing my clothes and i’ll be going through the pockets in my pants and i’ll find random vegetable seeds and papers and dirt and just random other stuff and it reminds me of when i was growing up and it’d be my turn to wash clothes or something and my dad would have all that same kind of stuff in his pockets. so maybe i am now becoming the agricultura de mi familia. anyway, so that’s all the huertos and planting stuff.

GENERAL MEDIO AMBIENTE STUFF (aka plans i thought up the night before)

the other day i did another activity with the 5th and 6th graders. there is this really small magazine that i think is supposed to be some kind of tourist magazine of el salvador...it’s super small though, like maybe 10 pages – if that – long. it comes out each month and in each issue there is an article about an animal or bird that lives in el salvador. the article is written by someone from this group called “salvanatura” which is this group that works here in el salvador in protecting the animals, plants, trees...everything nature-related. they work in el imposible (which is by me) and parque montecristo and other protected areas in el salvador. anyway, these articles talk about the animal’s color, size, where it lives, etc. and since niña teresita runs the hostal she gets multiple copies of the magazine for the “lobby.” so i found copies of about ten magazines and i cut out the animal articles. so i had the kids get in groups and they had to pick one of the animals and i gave them poster paper and they had to draw a picture of the animal and put its name at the top. then below that they had to list its characteristics. then each group had to go in front of the class and talk about their animal – which was funny because they are super shy in front of the class like that. but i just thought the activity was good because i didn’t have to do too much “lecturing” or anything. it was a good way to educate them on the local fauna and they had to read the article to get the characteristic information. plus they got to draw and color, which of course, they spent most of the time doing...but it was a good activity i think. and it totally worked out. and i was happy because before i went into their classroom, i was in the room next door, and i heard mirna tell them that i was gonna work with them and they were all clapping their hands and happy that i was gonna teach. so that’s good, right? so i’m doing stuff like that.

FRUSTRATION CENTRAL (aka other work i’m doing)

let me start by saying that one thing that i DON’T have to do is teach english. so many other volunteers end up doing this and i just have major problems with us teaching english. there are so many kids that have trouble with their own language, that i think it’s stupid for us to be teaching them english....taking time out of their already short day and teaching them a language they may or may not have to use in the future. there is this dude that they hired back in february who comes in a teaches english and computers, so i don’t have to do any of that thank god.

so anyway, my mom sent a bunch of spanish books to the teachers to use and i told them that i’d like to do that – read with the kids who are having trouble.....or just generally read with the kids - because it’ll help me with my pronunciation as well. anyways, the other day i went into mirna’s 1st grade classroom to see what she was doing with the kids and she asks me to take this one kid in the other classroom and work with him on this language stuff. so that was fine. and then elba brings in like three kids from her class and wants me to work with them too. supposedly on the same thing the other kid was working on, even though they are in different grades. so fine, whatever. then mirna brings in this other girl, who is partially deaf, so that i can work with her too. ok – it’s a little overwhelming, but i figured, at least they’re getting extra help, ya know? i mean, i’m not working on primary project stuff for the peace corps the entire time i’m at the school, so whatever. so that was that morning.

later in the afternoon, after i did the activity with the 5th and 6th graders, paola (elba’s daughter – who is now attending the school too...she had some kind of problem at her other school in apaneca [read on and you’ll probably guess what her “problem” was]) is hanging out because her dad (elba’s husband) couldn’t come to pick her up. so i was helping her with her homework. well, i have no idea why, but mirna had four 1st graders back in her classroom in the afternoon, sitting at a bunch of desks while she (and me, earlier on the whole animals of el salvador thing) is teaching to 5th and 6th graders. so since i was working with paola, who’s also in 1st grade, mirna decides to sherk these four 1st graders off on me. so i had three different 1st graders than the ones i had in the morning plus the karen (the partially deaf girl) and paola.

ALSO, let me backtrack....that morning, and the morning before, i was working on something in the empty classroom and i heard one of the 1st grade girls crying. the first morning i walked by and saw that it was paola. she was sobbing and mirna wasn’t paying attention to her. elba walked by the classroom a couple times and didn’t acknowledge that her daughter was crying or anything either. but of course, all the kids in the class were like “what’s wrong with paola? paola’s not working! blah, blah, blah” and mirna’s shouting instructions at the top of her voice about whatever it was they were doing in an effort to pretend not to pay attention to paola. friggin’ chaos. well that lasted like maybe half an hour or an hour. the second morning, paola bawled all morning long....like totally sobbing. WTF? but during recreo she’s fine and running around and what-not. so that afternoon, i’m working with her and i’m all scared she’s gonna start bawling but she ends up being fine. but i’m still all overwhelmed with these kids.

then the next day, i was just about ready to read some books with bessy’s kindergarten class, when mirna shuffles me in the other classroom and tells these kids that i’m gonna work with them again. so i’ve got erick, karen, ever, melissa and of course, paola. i’m not even sure why i’ve got this mix of kids because a couple of them have no problems whatsoever. we get two seconds into starting and paola starts bawling over absolutely nothing. all i’ve said is the word “dama” (they need to write the word down, spelled correctly). i’m not even kidding. i said “la primer palabra es dama.” and paola starts bawling. ??????? so i ask her what’s up and she’s sobbing something and i’m like – look, i don’t EVEN know what your problem is. and this is even more confusing because later, when she finally stopped and the kids were all acting wild and what-not, i had to do the whole “ok, the kids that work hard and listen are gonna get a sticker” routine. so i kept using that when they would get crazy and paola was acting horrible and finally i told her she wasn’t getting a sticker and she didn’t shed a tear. (i predict this girl is gonna have some big-time issues in the future.) so i never got to read with bessy’s class, because every time the 1st graders i was working with would finish a page, i’d tell them to go give it to mirna and they’d come back and say “seña says to do another one!”

AND, if that all wasn’t crazy enough, mirna came in at one point and was yelling about how the kids weren’t writing the words and sentences in the appropriate spaces in their notebooks, and i’m thinking “seriously? this is what you’re worried about? the organization of the words? shouldn’t it be on the fact that they’re spelling them correctly?” so she’s kind of yelling – not really, but kind of – at me that the kids need to leave space for the sentences and i’m like “i know, but you need to tell THEM that. i understand you.” because i had tried to explain it to the kids earlier and they didn’t get it so i just let it go because at least they were working and they were doing pretty good at the spelling and all that. so after mirna’s outburst, i told the kids that they had to write all the words in the top half of the page, and the sentences in the lower half and paola’s like “no, the words need to be in a list all the way down the page.” and i’m like “but you don’t have room for the sentences at the bottom then.” see, they try to copy exactly how it is in the book and the way it’s laid out all fits because it’s stuff that a book company laid out with a printing press or a computer – not by first graders with crazy handwriting. but they try and copy it how the book is so it looks exactly like that and of course, it doesn’t work because they don’t have enough room for the sentences and ugh.

ANYWAYS, so finally i draw a line in the middle of their pages and i say “look, you have to put all the words here in the top half and the sentences in the bottom half.” and it works out fantastically. they LOVE the simple fact that i draw a line in the middle of their page AND they understand it. so great, right? well, then mirna comes in later and says to paola “why do you have that line there” and paola tells her why and mirna tells her “you don’t need that line.” and i looked at mirna and i said “i’m the one that put the line there because they don’t understand that they have to leave room for the sentences at the bottom.” and she was like “oh, you did?” seriously, for fuck’s sake!

so yeah, mirna was all uptight about the “format” of their notebooks. and i was kind of like “ok, whatever” not making a big deal about it. i was a little irritated at mirna’s obsessiveness about it, but that’s pretty much how everything is here. salvadorans (and i’m not sure if this is true in other latin american countries) spend soooooo much time worrying about appearances. like with mirna and the notebooks. they ignore the big problems but spend huge amounts of time on presentation. mirna isn’t glad that they can spell these words and write the sentences....she’s mad that the notebooks look less than perfect. they’re 1st graders!!! they can barely write, let alone in perfect lines and all that!!! or like with the animals activity i did. one group wrote the name of their bird on the side of the picture and couldn´t fit it all on one line and they wrapped the words. mirna walked by and was like ¨you didn´t do that right, you should have left enough space for it all.¨ and i´m thinking - seriously, why is that important? they´re not giving a presentation to the board of directors at some huge company.

yesterday, during fisica, i was down on the football cancha sitting on one of these tires that surround it, and this other dude who sometimes works with the boys on soccer, comes over and is hesitant to sit down because there’s a little dirt on the tires. and i’m thinking – you just threw your plastic mango bag on the ground where it joined all the other churro bags and candy wrappers and you’re worried about getting a couple specks of dirt on your pants? meanwhile, i’m sitting my ass on one of the tires, my pants have mud and dirt on the bottom of the pant legs and on the front (from working in the huertos). i KNOW that there are people who think i’m the “gringa sucia” because when i work at the school, i get dirty from the mud and dirt and whatever else. my shoes always have mud on them, a lot of the time my pants do, my hair’s not perfect, i don’t wear makeup or anything. and you know what, i could give a rat’s ass. i’m not peeing on the side of the road, i’m not throwing my trash in the street.

i mean, who are the people here kidding? seriously? on any given day i can walk down the street in apaneca and see some dude peeing on the wall of a building or house. or on the bus.....i’ve seen people hack up loogies and not even spit them out the window. no, they bend their heads and spit on the floor of the bus in front of them. the kids at school even. i’ve seen some of them NOT walk up to the school to use the restroom, but drop trou right on the side of the cancha and do their business. and the teachers, while they don’t encourage this, don’t yell at the kids and tell them to get their butts up to the school bathrooms either.

while this might seem just plain gross, and it is, it’s also the cause of serious contamination problems leading to lots and lots of illnesses. what is frustrating for someone like me witnessing all this is the fact that they HAVE appropriate places to go to the bathroom – especially at the school – it’s not like they have to “hold it” all day or something. but you know, i don’t even blame the kids because they just do what their parents do. all the houses in san jorge have latrines or bathrooms, so there is no excuse here for the people here, adults especially, doing that. i should point out, though, that not ALL kids do this, and not ALL adults do this either. i’m just speaking in terms of how ironic it is that i’m seen as the “dirty” foreigner, or the weirdo teacher because of the whole lines-in-the-notebook thing, when there are salvadorans who are doing things that i would consider way more “sucia,” but because they look perfect or “presentable” doing those things, it’s ok. does that even make sense?

but getting back to the whole presentation thing.....i already told you how the people here iron EVERYTHING. when i was in molineros whenever it was, ana was ironing dayana’s and sindy’s clothes and then saying “i’m so tired. i have a headache from ironing all these clothes.” ??????? i can understand dayana’s school uniform. but sindy’s clothes??? the ones she’s gonna wear for a couple hours until she spills juice or candy or rolls around in the dirt in? i think ana could’ve skipped those – which was probably the bulk of the clothes – and saved herself a headache. but it’s the whole “appearance” thing.

so to end this dissertation of my work as i head on into my 8th month here....... please don’t think i’m a jerk for being frustrated. i DON’T WANT to sound like an asshole, which i probably do. in fact, i REALLY don’t want to be an asshole, because working with the kids is fantastic. and everyone here, in both apaneca and san jorge (and everywhere else), most of the time, is absolutely swell. they are nice and caring and do everything they can to make me feel welcome here and feel like it is my actual home for 2 years. and i DO feel like it’s home. it’s just that there are also times where i start to feel it, that crappy feeling that maybe i am “better off” simply because i’m from the states and things are different there. i absolutely DON’T want to feel like that AT ALL. i want to believe that the people here can change the way they view some things....that’s it’s NOT ok for a girl to only complete 6th grade....it’s NOT ok to ruin not only YOUR environment and health, but THE environment and EVERYONE ELSE’s health by throwing your shit all over the place and using the football cancha/street/wall of another person’s house as your own personal bathroom.....that maybe it’s OK if your 11-year-old doesn’t iron the whole family’s clothes because the 11-year-old needs to go to school.....that it’s NOT ok to take an hour of school away each day for a week (when they are only in school for 3½ hours a day) so the girls can practice dances (some of which are totally inappropriate) for yet ANOTHER fiesta......

and while i want people here to change their views on things like i just previously mentioned, i’m changing MY views on things as well because of the people here.....like:

you do NOT have to be able to communicate with words all the time - you can understand people fine (even when you have no idea what they’re saying) when they smile and take your hand and shuffle you into their home for almuerzo that they probably can’t even afford...you know who they are and where their heart is;

living my life without unnecessary complications – jesus did i spend a lot of time worrying about pointless crap back in the states;

being a more visibly affectionate person – i thought i was a friendly person back home, but being here has turned me into some kind of super amazing friendly person;

appreciating my family more – i don’t think i’ve ever realized why it’s so great to have parents and grandparents and cousins and kids until coming here; and

not relying on material things so much, but appreciating the non-material stuff – we are obsessed with material stuff in the states...every single one of us, and i know when i come back i’m definitely going to be at least a little less obsessed.

ANYWAY -

i need a vacation!!!!


3rd and 4th grade girls planting cucumber

johana covering the first row

johana making the next row

norma

ruth

selena, leti (leti HATES getting her picture taken, and ALWAYS has this face in pics she ends up...i always tell her she doesn´t HAVE to be in any pictures, but occasionally she gets peer-pressured into it and settles for just giving me this face), johanna, jenifer, norma, alexandra and ruth (with the rake)

the 5th and 6th grade boys planting radishes, carrots and peas





3rd and 4th grade boys planting lettuce and beets in starter bolsas









jonathan and david working on the animals of el salvador activity



juan carlos

melvin and lucas

el gavalin pajarero

tucan verde

torogoz

la montaña: a really pathetic documentary

well, i did it. i climbed la montaña and the only proof i have (other than some lame pictures) are some really sore feet, legs and lungs. you all know how much of a photo freak i’ve been since being down here – taking pictures of nearly everything. well, i don’t have that many to show you of this hike because most of the time i was wondering whether or not i was gonna die of a heart attack or something. hopefully i’ll be able to get some from some other people who took better photos or who weren’t dying along the way. climbing’s hard!!!! 1,700 meters of it is really, super hard! i think the final estimate was that we climbed something like 6 or 7 miles. anyway, i’ll try to take you through the hike as best i can.

so after the second parade i’ve been a part of in two weeks here in apaneca, i left for metapán via ahuachapán and santa ana. metapán is the northernmost ciudad in santa ana and it’s where we all were meeting kate. the bus i picked up in santa ana happened to have four other people who were going on the hike too, so we all rode the bus up to metapán together. when we got there, kate was pointing to these mountains in the distance and saying “we’re going there.” it was kind of daunting seeing them standing there, waiting for us. there was also this big cloud hanging over them and kate kept saying she thought it was gonna rain and if so, we were in for a rough night. kate’s counterpart, oscar, came to pick us up at the bus terminal and took us to this place to get panes rellenos and so we all fueled up – which was probably a bad idea....i mean, seriously, panes rellenos? i can’t believe i ate one. it’s basically a big ‘ol hot dog bun with chicken, some kind of chili sauce, cucumbers, radishes, lettuce, mayo, ketchup (i think), and some other kind of mystery sauce. there are probably at least four other ingredients i’m forgetting or otherwise didn’t identify at the time, but you get the picture. i mean, in my mind eating a pane relleno right before going on a 6 hour uphill climb is like saying you’re gonna eat a chili dog with EVERYTHING on it right before doing a triathlon or something. i don’t know. maybe not.

so we ate this tasty food and then piled back into the pickup. the pickup ride was great! oscar has this pickup, that’s relatively new, so it’s pretty nice. but it has a double cab so the bed isn’t that big. and there were i think 15 of us AND all of our gear, so the ride was hilarious! we were hanging out of the back trying not to imagine what would happen if the back gate decided to pop open. anyway, we weaved our way through metapán and then finally onto the dirt road that leads to kate’s site, and eventually the area where we’d have to begin the hike. before i start in on how much it hurt to hike this mountain, let me just say that kate’s site is beautiful. it was really quiet and it smelled so awesome, just like a forest should. and by the time we were riding through the forest it was already about 6:30 p.m. or so, so we sat in the back of the pickup and when we weren’t joking around, we were just taking in how awesome it was. you have to remember that nearly everyone in the pickup, except me, lives in a hot-as-hell site where it’s seriously at least 80-90 degrees every single day of the year. so for most of them the experience of actually being a little chilly in the mountain air was heaven.

kate’s house is great – she actually rents a house that’s on the property of some people next door to her. it’s totally perfect – she’s got a sweet porch and the best part is that she’s actually living in the mountains. i live in the mountains too, but i’m in a pueblo and so i don’t have trees on my doorstep and what-not. she’s got everything. anyway, we got all prepared there and her neighbors made us this raspberry fresco – made from raspberries picked right there next to the friggin’ house. york kept calling it “gummi berry juice” and that was just making me laugh. jared also showed us how to hypnotize chickens. and megan showed off her new head lamp which made her look like a crazy person, but was the perfect thing for this night hike. (p.s. i really, really want one!) but the fun-n-games had to end at some point and we all hiked back up the hill to oscar who was waiting in the truck for us. he was going to take us to the place where we could start the actual hike. we could have started it from there, but it probably would have taken us another two hours....so he was not only helping us save on time, but probably saving us some muscle pain as well. so we rode for quite a ways and then ended up at the end of the line. some dude lives in his house with his family at this ending point and there was some part of me that wanted him to tell us we couldn’t go. i knew this hike was going to be hard, just like i knew the volcano was going to be hard, just like i knew hiking the grand canyon was going to be hard. and to tell you the truth – i’m not sure why i do these things? i guess maybe personal challenge or some kind of nonsense like that. because i’m not a great hiker. i’m not a crappy hiker either. i mean, i make it. and i always am glad i did afterwards. but let me tell you, i’m not one of those people who enjoys feeling like someone is punching me in the lungs while i’m trying to climb up rocks and stuff. some people love it. or they don’t feel it or whatever. but i sure as hell feel it. i feel every second of it and in my mind, i’m not thinking “oh isn’t this just such a great FEELING? what a great workout!” no, i’m thinking along these lines: “this absolutely sucks! why did i come on this hike! NEVER again!”

anyway, after some dillydallying, we finally pack up and start the hike. uphill from the get-go. we follow this little road until bart turns off and yells that we’ve officially started the hike. yay for us! and it’s “officially” hard. i think the thing that gets me about climbing like this is having to heave your whole body up onto a “step” rock or something. know what i mean by a “step” rock? i don’t know what else to call it. there’s probably some technical term for what i’m talking about, but i certainly don’t know it. just read on, i think you’ll get it. you’re walking uphill, which isn’t THAT bad...depending on how vertical it is. but it’s basically just kind of a rhythmic momentum that you get into. so you’re in this momentum and then suddenly you have to change it and give everything you’ve got to hurl your body to take a giant step up onto a rock and then keep walking uphill. that’s damn hard! then you’ve got the SERIES of step rocks which you don’t know if you should take one step at a time with both feet (one foot up, leave it there, bring the other foot up onto the same rock), or try to climb like a set of stairs (one foot up, leave it there, bring the other foot onto the rock above it, leave it there, etc.,etc.). you honestly want to shoot yourself in the head when you finally reach the end of a series of those. and the thing i hate the most about all of this is when someone is behind me. whether or not they’re “on my heels,” i hate that feeling of someone walking behind me. so i kept trying to bring up the rear, because i could care less if i’m last. in case you hadn’t guessed, i’m not that competitive...i’m not in a race to see who can get to the top first. i’d rather have to keep up than have to hurry because i think i’m holding someone else up. and of course there’d be mark or bart there trying to be the “nice guy” and not wanting me to be at the end alone and i’m smiling and saying “no, it’s ok, i’m totally good” but i’m thinking “no, seriously, fucking GO AHEAD OF ME ALREADY for fuck’s sake!!!! see the red shirt i’m wearing? i’m the caboose in this goddamned train! GO!!”

so we finally get to what kate said was the half-way point, which was this amazing gigantic rock on the side of a stream. it felt so good to take off the pack and eat some food. i’ll admit, that first half was hard, but i felt pretty good. i kept thinking – if the second half is anywhere near the same, i’ll feel really good about this hike. don’t get me wrong...there were parts of it where i was seriously huffing and puffing, but i didn’t feel like i wanted to turn around and go back or quit or whatever. we hung out at the rock for quite some time, just chilling out and eating some food. some of us climbed on top of the rock, which made me feel like gollum because we were actually scaling it – having to find footholds and all that jazz. and at the top it was AMAZING. the sky was only slightly cloudy with the moon behind the partial clouds and just seeing the sides of the mountains looming beside us was beautiful. plus we could kind of see just how far we had climbed which seemed impossible.

but all that ended and we had to start up again which was kind of a glum feeling. but nevertheless, i packed up and shipped out like everyone else. it was hard, but i felt a little energized from the rest so it wasn’t too bad. after a five minute stretch we took a short rest for a second making sure everyone was together and started back up again. and dudes, it was at this point that i felt like i had lost complete and total energy. there were more series of rocks during this part of the trail and it was getting really, really hard to get up them. but i kept moving and trying to drink water and gatorade. i felt like shit though. i was struggling! and i was feeling less and less like i was just doing something hard, but more and more like i was doing something i was gonna kill myself doing. but i kept climbing and climbing and climbing. there were some nice little breaks when kate wasn’t sure of the trail and had to go investigate with bart. kate’s uncertainty was totally my savior! anyway, after what seemed like DAYS, we finally made it to the top....well, it wasn’t actually the top. but we made it to the cabaña where we were going to set up camp for the night. oscar doesn’t just own a nice pickup, but he has this swell cabin up there with this breathtaking view of the valley. it was about 2:30 a.m. and had taken us roughly 6 hours, más or menos, to hike to where we were. but i felt really gross, like sick to my stomach gross. and i couldn’t really tell if it was because i was worn out, or because i didn’t drink enough water (i thought i drank plenty) or because i ate all the wrong stuff before climbing (he-llo?? panes rellenos??). i was just feeling plain lousy. and of course york and mark were getting out the wine and the booze ($2.00 troika rubbing alcohol, i mean, vodka....gross even when you’re NOT feeling like ass) and everyone’s wanting to eat and whatever. i ate some food and even had some wine which actually didn’t taste that bad. we listened to some awesome bluegrass and just sat around the campfire joking around for a while (real mature stuff like repeated lines of “what happens on brokeback mountain, stays on brokeback mountain.”). at some point though it hit me and my stomach lurched. i rounded the cabin and ba-arfed. but like all good barfs, i felt so much better afterwards and re-joined the campfire!

that night was spent on the floor of the cabin in my sleeping bag, tossing and turning. would you believe that the best thing i brought with me to el salvador has turned out to be my sleeping bag? it’s the perfect size and it packs so easily. and it’s totally worked out for me because i got assigned to one of the coldest parts of el salvador, so i use it on my bed too. and it certainly came in handy that night in the cabaña. it was cold, but i felt ok. it was just the wooden planks beneath me that were making me wish i was back in my tiny bed in my cuarto in apaneca. well, the wooden planks AND the thought that kate kept talking about climbing even further in the morning (it WAS morning!) to the cloudforest. AND the fact that we still had to descend this mountain at some point, which may SOUND easy – but i’m the last person to forget the effects of down-the-mountain treks. canyon toe, anyone? my toes still haven’t completely healed from the volcano hike back in november!

so somewhere around 9:30 a.m. or so we started rounding up our stuff and i was contemplating whether or not to go on this second hike. kate kept saying it’d take like 20 minutes or something like that and i know that sounds like a piece of cake. i mean, what’s 20 minutes? but it’s not the length of time, it’s the height that you gotta climb in that 20 minutes. not to mention, 20 minutes for kate is certainly not 20 minutes for me. anyway, i was leaning towards hanging back at the cabin while the rest went to the top because my stomach was still not feeling too great. megan gave me some alka-seltzer and i have to say i was quite surprised at how much better i felt after drinking it. better enough to actually agree to climb farther. so we set off (minus our packs) for the cloudforest. it wasn’t so much getting to see the cloudforest as wanting to just do the damn thing, you know? i’ve got cloudforests in my site, right here in laguna las ninfas and cerro apaneca that i get to hike through without all the pain...well, some pain.....so it wasn’t like i wasn’t going to ever be able to see a cloudforest again while in el salvador or anything. i don’t know. bottom line is, i willingly hiked further UP that day.

somewhere along the trail – and kate warned us of this – kate didn’t quite know which way to go. she wasn’t familiar with the trail around that area, but it really wasn’t that big of a deal to me. we got to the edge of the cloudforest and she basically just said to start climbing up. “up” meant some almost straight-line vertical climbing...hanging onto vines and branches indiana jones style, and pulling yourself up to the next ledge. the ground was this flimsy leaf-covered, mulch-like dirt that broke away the minute you stepped on it. it was wet (because it’s in the clouds) and over half of the branches you’d grab onto to pull yourself up or for support had inch-long thorns on them. it was great! actually, i really LIKED this part of the hike. it was strenuous at points, but i kind of liked the aspect of having to contemplate my next move. was i going to take this route, or this one? this branch, or this one? i loved actually “climbing.” when we finally got to the top and sat down for a spell, i was dog-tired (again), but feeling really good about deciding to go up there. because that part of the climb i really liked, even though it was still difficult.

going down that part was hard too, but again, i loved it. i liked being in the forest and having to negotiate each and every step made it a little easier to notice things around me – the trees, plants, flowers, birds. we ate raspberries the whole way – they were growing everywhere – and they tasted so amazing. the crap part about being that high up though is that when there are opportunities for good views of the valleys and things below, you can’t really see much because of the clouds. but there were breaks at different points and i felt truly lucky to have the opportunity to be on top of the mountain looking down on everything. this area is also near the honduras, guatemala and el salvador borders so it was cool to think that you could probably see two other countries from that point in el salvador – although i’m not sure if i actually did because of the clouds and all. it was just really beautiful regardless. the euphoria had to end though as we continued the trek back to the cabaña to pick up our backpacks and make the journey down.

we left the cabaña at around 1:30 p.m. and because we were kind of on a time constraint – the last bus from metapán to santa ana left at 5:00 p.m. or something – we had to book it. in fact, kate said something like “we really need to get going” and then bart followed up with “yeah, we need to correr” (which means to run). not words i really wanted to hear. descending the mountain sucked, but i knew it would and all i kept thinking was “at least i can friggin’ breathe!” but it’s a weird feeling after using what you think are ALL your leg muscles to climb, and then turning around to go down and finding out you have a gazillion OTHER leg muscles that are now screaming bloody murder. you’re all wobbly and unbalanced and trying to negotiate the same rocks you just climbed up onto. this, unbelievably, is even more difficult. i don’t know how, but it just is. it could also be something psychological too – like when you’re doing something incredibly difficult, it seems like nothing could be as difficult at that moment. or something like that.

anyway, down, down, down.....back to the rock and i knew this moment was coming too. i had been dreading this stretch of the trail ever since we hiked down it the night before. yes, you read that right. when we hiked DOWN it. there was this huge part of the trail leading to the rock that was pretty much all downhill, and parts of it were kind of steep. and i remember thinking how great it was the night before when i was super tired from climbing....hearing the stream and getting to go downhill and all that. it probably was responsible for me feeling not-so-bad when we arrived at the rock. but at one point i thought – but tomorrow, we have to climb back up this part to get back home. and so here we were – leaving for this part of the trail that i had been thinking about all night and day. and it wasn’t so much a punch-to-the-gut as it was a slow death. having to climb something like that after thinking you’re done with climbing, and having to switch back to using muscles that thought you were done using them and have settled into tightening themselves up is not really the way i’d like to end a hike. but that’s pretty much how it ended. well, we had more downhill after that, but at that point i was kind of zoning out. every rock looked like the last one, every switchback the same as the previous switchback, trees were just trees – not pinos or robles or cedras or whatever – just brown or gray trunks with green leaves hanging off the branches. it was like i was simply putting one foot in front of the other regardless of how it felt or where it would lead me. much of the trail downhill after this was actually a dried-out wash...a very narrow wash. i mean, olive oyl would have had problems standing up. add the loose rocks on the bottom and the fact that you’re going downhill and it’s a pretty treacherous hike. i didn’t remember it being that crazy on the way up – but that could have been because it was dark and all i had was a mag lite. no sé.

FINALLY the roof of the house we had started from about 30-some odd hours before came into view and instead of feeling elated, i still felt a bit of dread. see, we weren’t supposed to be getting a ride from the house back to kate’s house. kate’s house was still quite a ways down the road....and then we’d still have to walk even farther to the actual road to catch a bus going to metapán. the previous night’s ride from oscar was a random thing and on saturday’s hike back we weren’t going to have the privilege of riding all fancy in a pickup truck back to kate’s house. but when i rounded the corner after coming through the gate, i saw his beautiful pickup parked in front of the house and my heart did a little dance. oscar was there! and then i found out that he was going to take us all the way to metapán! i told courtney i wanted to give him a big hug or something, but i settled for shotgunning a cold coke that a woman (i think she is the wife of the guy we saw the night before) who lived in the house sold us. so we loaded up in the pickup after everyone was ready and it was a sweeeet ride back through the mountain and onto metapán. there wasn’t time for me to make it back to apaneca, or anyone to else to make it back to their sites, because it was so late by the time we got to santa ana....so we all took the final bus from santa ana into san salvador and ate pizza. i slept like a log that night – the best sleep i’ve ever had, or probably ever will have, at the estancia.

so how am i feeling today, now that i’m back all cozy and happy in apaneca? physically, the muscles are on the mend......still a little sore. believe it or not my stomach’s still acting a little weird. i’m praying i don’t have parasitios, but i honestly don’t think i do. i’ve been eating weirdo food (american!) lately – the pizza in san sal, then i had a hamburguesa the other night here in apaneca. it’s always the american food that makes me sick, so i’m just gonna blame my stomach ailments on the u.s. there’s enough other junk going on in the world right now that’s got the u.s. to blame so why not throw my upset stomach in there too.

mentally, yes, i’m glad i hiked it. i like seeing other people’s sites. i’m proud of myself for making it. it’s weird, though, because sitting here i’m thinking – it wasn’t that bad, was it? see, that’s the problem. it was “that bad.” at least while i was doing it! i somehow think i could’ve been a little more prepared. i thought i was because i’ve been doing all this hiking here. but i sometimes fall into the trap that i’m hiking a lot or far or whatever, when in reality i’m not. you see, here, the mountains are just about as high as the ones up there....maybe a couple hundred meters or so less high in some areas. but the thing is, let’s take cerro apaneca for instance. it’s height is roughly 1,800 meters and change. the height at the cabaña (someone actually had a gps) was something like 2,030 meters...that’s about 200 or so meters difference...not that much. the problem is, when i hike cerro apaneca, i’m starting in apaneca and apaneca is the highest elevated pueblo in the whole country of el salvador. so when i leave from apaneca, i’m already at 1,480 meters, so i’m not actually climbing the whole 1,800 meters – only about 300+ or so. the mountain we hiked this past weekend, well, we started (i think) from about 300 meters....so, you get the picture. as my friend eric would say - do the math.

i mean, this ain’t the rockies or K2 or anything like that (add another 2,000 meters to get to the top of some of the peaks in the rockies), and i’m sure there are some people that think these mountains are nothing....like if they’re not super high, then they’re not worth hiking or seeing. but you know, it’s not about that at all. i love being able to see this country. there are volunteers here who don’t do this shit. not to mention probably 90% of salvadorans haven’t even been to northern santa ana. i told some people in san jorge/apaneca that i was going to parque montecristo and they looked at me like i was talking about someplace in thailand. not everyone has the opportunity to do this kind of stuff, and i like being outdoors...not partying in san salvador all the time. this country really is beautiful and it’s a shame that not everyone can (or wants to) appreciate it.

anyway, i maybe could have tried to train a little more? next time? will there be a next time for me? not for a couple months, that’s for sure. oh, whatever. i hiked a mountain. it’s done. i’m back. and i’m not dead. i guess that’s all the analysis it really needs. although, i did get kind of an ego deflator the other day at school. i was watching the guatemalan news during lunch and there was a story about this dude with no feet who climbed mount everest. yeah. he wore these metal prosthetic “feet” and friggin’ climbed everest. he doesn’t have feet and he climbed EVEREST? and i’m whining about my – cough, cough – poor lungs and sore muscles, oh and my aching tummy, because i climbed a goddamned mountain that’s what, fifty gazillion meters less where there’s oxygen? puhleeze! i have feet! end of story. boy, i’m pathetic!

until i get better ones from other people, enjoy the photos! and go subir a mountain, wherever you are!

here´s megan with her cool headlamp

this is the cabaña where we camped

this is what the view looked like for me as i sat on a piece of wood on the ground. this has got to be the shittiest picture i´ve taken of a view that was 1,000 times better. lo siento.

i think this is a nice picture...a tree in the middle of the stream next to the rock (the rock´s on the right)

me at the very, very top of the cloudforest - i was sooooo tired and i definitely look it.

i had to take a picture of brendan with his disposable camera....every time he would take a picture we´d all start laughing hysterical b/c it´d make that boxy ¨click¨ sound.

courtney and brendan in front of the rock

NEW PICTURES (posted august 17, 2006)

early morning view of the valley below the cabin

me and maria

view of the valley looking down towards metapán

courtney, me, bart, mark

york and bart

yours truly

odds and ends

it´s getting ready to thunderstorm right now. you wouldn´t believe the weather today here. there were times when you couldn´t even see the football cancha right next to the school because there was so much fog - like in the middle of the day. it´s just because we´re so high up here in this area and when a storm´s coming the clouds literally cover the mountains and sweep over apaneca and san jorge and everywhere else around here. it´s so funny because the rest of the country (other than way up north in santa ana and chalatenango) is sweltering hot right now and the thought of fog rolling into places like la unión or san vicente is hilarious. there´s supposed to be another parade tomorrow in apaneca (for the older kids this time) and some soccer and softball games in san jorge. we might just get rained on. plus i´m supposed to hike that mountain tomorrow night too. if it´s raining like mad, i ain´t going. it´s bad enough trying to hike up mountains like that, let alone on slippery rocks all the while getting drenched. we´ll see!!! i really do want to hike it!!!

it was mother´s day here on wednesday. so there was no school, no government offices were open, and at 5:00 a.m. (no i´m not kidding), the alcalde´s ¨speaker¨ (everytime there is a death in apaneca or something of importance to tell the people of apaneca, this dude gets on this loudspeaker, which is located in the mayor´s building, and tells the entire town about whatever it is) started talking about it being mother´s day and then went on to play this kind of traditional spanish music, but because it was on the loudspeaker it sounded like carnival ride music. so happy mother´s day! i thought that day was the same ´round the world, isn´t it always on a sunday in the states?? i did send some things home to my mom though this week, so don´t think i´m a dunce and totally spaced mother´s day in the states.

got some more photos to share!

here are some photos of the kids planting flower and vegetable seeds in the seed planters. we only have four planters, so the rest of the seeds we´re planting in small bags. because there are so many kinds of crazy insects here (and the ants are HUGE), it´s better to plant the harder-to-grow stuff in a planter or bags and then transplant them. anyway, the kids did a great job and we´ve got quite a few ¨plantitos¨ now. we´re going to plant the seeds that can go directly into the soil next week.















ATZUMPA

atzumpa is this area near ataco that has a couple of outdoor pools run by the water company here in el salvador. it´s weird because it´s really kind of in the middle of nowhere in this forest. but there are the most amazing trees there and it´s pretty tranquilo.

ok, so take a look at this tree. like always, a photo will never do this tree justice. but i tried to get a couple pictures just to show how amazing it is.

another view of the tree

ok, so here´s me standing next to the tree. see how huge it is! (i´m talking about the tree! not me!)

a cool example of a live barrier. this is ezote (the national flower of el salvador) planted on the side of the cerro to prevent erosion.

this is a nice picture i took inside the actual forest surounding atzumpa and the pools

a platano tree

bamboo leaves

clavel...yes, the same flower as the pink clavel i posted pictures of before, but a different type. this is a ¨clavel normal¨ and the pink one is a ¨clavel colocho.¨

TECH TRAINING

here are a couple of photos ashley took at our tech training at the escuela naciónal agronomía in san andres.

here we are working on fruit trees - trimming the branches so they´ll grow more fruit and spend less energy on the branches not producing fruit.

our group, minus a few people, ¨hugging¨ what the second dude from the left thinks is the last-known melon tree in el salvador. no, not melon like cantaloupe or whatever. but anyway, this tree has a sad story, but it´s possible that it could end nicely. there just might be two more of these trees - one in sonsonate and the other i think in la libertad. but this melon tree got struck by lightning and is pretty much dead and the guy that works at the MAG (minesterio de agricultura) is trying to save the species. they have tree seeds at the seed bank there and have tried starting a vivero, but haven´t had a lot of luck....viveros are super hard to start. so i think rolando (our ag4/ee peace corps director - the guy on the far left - took some seeds from there and is going to try and figure out how to have a successful vivero.